Last year, our life editor took on the challenge of turning the 2003 romantic comedy How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days into an article. Her twist? She wrote how to find a guy in 10 steps! As sports editor and a guy with a girlfriend, I figured I’d try the opposite.
Graphic by Pacen Gregory.
How to Find a Girl in 10 Steps
(Hygiene not included, that’s a given.)
Step 1: A good night or a good life?
Fellas, this step is important. If you go into the world not knowing what you want, you won’t have sustained success. Ask yourself: Are you looking for a relationship and a good life, or just a good night?
If you’re aiming for the latter, then you need to identify what you truly want. If you’re religious, would you go to the bar for some drinks with this girl? If you are not religious, ask would you go to church for her? Only then will you know what you really want.
Step 2: Be real
Dating in 2026 is full of bad advice, especially the bro-approved “engagement baiting” strategies that would never work in real life. Be unapologetically yourself. Nerd? Be a nerd. Sports fan? Be a jock. Wear your hobbies on your sleeve. Authenticity goes a long way, and the girls will notice your genuine personality.
Step 3: Leagues don’t exist
Forget the idea of “out of your league.” It’s a myth. If you see a girl you’re interested in, go for it. Confidence is key. Put yourself out there and shoot your shot. If leagues existed, I’d be a rat in the sewers, but thankfully, in the real world, I’ve been blessed.
Step 4: Talk, don’t text
Easier said than done. Every guy has that moment when he sends the first text: “Either this phone goes through the window, or we’re lit.” Build a connection in person. Touch grass. Stop relying on endless texting, it sets you up for failure.
Step 5: Accept rejection
Think like a football player: If one play goes wrong, move on. If a girl rejects you, thank her for her time and move on. There are countless reasons for rejection; it’s not a reflection on you. And yes, “I have a boyfriend” counts as a rejection, so don’t be weird, fellas.
Step 6: Stand tall, or don’t stand at all
If you want a serious relationship, make that clear. I’m not saying lay out your future at the first meeting, but don’t let yourself be trapped in the friend zone. Be honest about your intentions. If it doesn’t work out, refer back to Step 4.
Step 7: Follow the two-week rule
The two-week rule is simple. If you can’t plan a hangout or in-person event within two weeks, take Elsa’s advice and “let it go.” It keeps the excitement alive and establishes you as a person, not just a phone screen.
Step 8: Have good music taste
I know it’s a tough pill to swallow. Whether you’re a hip-hop head like me or a country-loving cowboy, don’t get stuck in your ways. Be willing to throw on some Ella Langley or Rihanna every once in a while. Great music taste is underrated. The ladies notice, and they have amazing taste.
Step 9: Be a good person
Shocking, right? Men have lost the plot on this one recently. It’s not just about treating your girl with respect, it’s about being genuinely good to everyone around you. Lift someone up when they’re down, hold doors—even from 20 yards away—buy flowers, and never let that flame go out, even when things are hard. Ladies notice this more than anything. As they say, every Superman needs their Lois.
Step 10: There are way more than ten steps
Fellas, we’ve been trying to figure out women since the beginning of time. No amount of walkthroughs or tips will give you a copy-and-paste solution. Women are individual, complicated, and unique, and that’s what makes them special. So, if you find one who truly cares and likes you, don’t choke it away.
Disclaimer: Sure, you could sue me if these don’t work, but if you do, we’ll all know why they didn’t work.
