Dealing with grieving
Thus far in my life I have been fortunate enough to experience only a minimal amount of loss. The few deaths I have had to deal with have been slightly removed from my immediate friends and family and, unfortunately, were not entirely unexpected.
However, in light of the recent passing of my former high school teacher (and one of the most intelligent, witty and passionate women I’ve had the pleasure to know), I’ve spent some time contemplating how poorly most of us are equipped to deal with situations such as these.
I keep coming back to lyrics from the Brand New song “Seventy Times 7” to describe it: “Back in school they never taught us what we needed to know, like how to deal with despair or someone breaking your heart.”
Nothing I’ve encountered in life, particularly in my schooling, has prepared me for loss. I’m not sure that a person can ever be prepared for it, but it does seem that at least as far as academics are concerned, there may be ways to help deal with devastating circumstances.
First and foremost I’ve found it helpful to contact professors and inform them of the situation at hand. All of my professors have been wonderfully understanding in the past, although I know this isn’t always the case. Some professors may ask for proof of the deceased’s passing or require you to complete schoolwork or tests regardless.
If you’re struggling to deal with your grief, it may be useful to talk to a professional. Idaho State University offers free counseling services to all currently enrolled students. Students at the Pocatello campus can visit the Counseling and Testing Service located at Graveley Hall South Room 351. The Idaho Falls campus also offers counseling services.
Though I have yet to attend my teacher’s memorial service as I write this, I am certain that I’ll be astounded and moved by the way the community in Mountain Home will pull together to remember Danni Gilbert.
Often it takes the support and kindness of others to deal with grief and loss. If you’re in need of a support system, reaching out to friends, family members or even acquaintances such as classmates can be a huge comfort.
I’ve been lucky enough to have an amazing group of friends and coworkers to support me and I hope I can offer the same comfort for those who need it.
Have you had to deal with an important loss during the school year? Feel free to share your experiences or any advice with me via email at ude.usinull@feihcgb, or on our Facebook page at www.facebook.com/isubengal. Any and all help you can offer fellow students is appreciated.
