Nicole’s Niche: The Bystander’s Dilemma

Nicole Blanchard

Editor-in-Chief

Last week my column addressed the unfortunate topic of street harassment on campus. Though I was surprised to learn of these types of things happening on campus, I’ve always felt like Idaho State University’s campus is not as bad as many other places are.

Ironically enough, I not only experienced catcalling firsthand the night my column was published, I also witnessed the worst (and hopefully only) case of harassment I’ve ever seen in public, let alone on ISU grounds.

I’m not sure what possesses an individual to follow a clearly distraught person down the street, especially when that person is begging to be left alone, but these individuals exist everywhere, even on Martin Luther King Drive in Pocatello.

I’m a pretty shy person, so my default is not to involve myself in the affairs of other people, but having just written a column about intervening, I couldn’t just stand by.

My roommate and I walked behind the two, hoping for an opportunity to step in and see if the girl was safe or needed help. That’s when we realized that stepping in really isn’t that simple.

What are you supposed to say? How are you supposed to react if the person you’re hoping to help maintains that she doesn’t need your assistance?

We were at a loss. We considered interjecting with some kind of unrelated request – could she give us directions to the closest store or help us jump our car – but nothing seemed like a particularly good idea.

Finally, we resigned ourselves to just standing by. If things escalated we thought we would jump in when the time was right. Eventually the harasser left, but the girl we were hoping to check in with got into a car and left immediately after.

I was a little bit shaken up by the experience and the thought of how I might have reacted had the situation gotten any worse.

Then I started to feel a little guilty. How could I urge others to stand up for their fellow students when I was struggling to have the tools to do so myself?

Lately I’ve been talking to friends and coworkers about that issue when the conversation turns to other situations: how would you react if you saw someone hit their child or pet in public? Moreover, how do you react if that person is a friend?

I think a lot of us have very blurry ideas of what situations require outside intervention, and the bystander effect doesn’t help. When an altercation occurs in front of a group of people, it’s easy to expect someone else to take action or alert the authorities, when in reality that mindset often keeps help at bay indefinitely.

I certainly don’t have the answers. Individual circumstances surely play a role in how we should react, but I hope we can all make decisions a bit easier by preparing plans of action in advance, including those silly questions that can help someone escape an uncomfortable encounter.

Once again, I hope we can go right to the source with these things and encourage people to treat one another with respect. But when we can’t, it’s never bad to be prepared.

Do you have suggestions on how to interject in a potentially dangerous situation? Let us know on Facebook or email me at ude.usinull@feihcgb.

 

Nicole is a senior majoring in Mass Communication.